“Elementary my dear friend, most elementary”- as Sherlock Holmes would have exclaimed. If still in doubt then let me give a gentle reminder of the caveat- 
donot underestimate the power 💪 of the poor n dear ‘ol “anus”.
Yes it is !! We always tend to underestimate the “anus”.
But it is just like the mother. We donot realize its presence untill it becomes non-funtional or diseased. In that case just imagine how frustating it is when it is infact absent- a situation which myself encounter almost on daily basis on the strength of being in my special specialty of Pediatric Surgery. This frustation is so aptly described in the colloquial ‘kahawat’ –
নহ্ বাৰ ঘৰ’ত চলি হ’ল,
নাম থলাক গপাল।
হাগ্ বাক লেগি ফোপ (ৰাষ্টা) নাই,
হাই মোৰ কাপাল।।
(Courtesy Prof NC Bhattacharyya sir)
And what about the adage “one wants to fart the most, only when one cannot” or the Assamese saying “হগাৰ সমান সুখ নাই” !!
Realizing such potential only did the great surgeon Willis Potts commented that “A properly functioning rectum is an unappreciated gift of greatest price”. By the word “rectum” he meant the “anus” only for, he went on to conclude that- “The child who is so unfortunate as to be born with an imperforate anus may be saved a lifetime of misery and social seclusion by the surgeon who with skill, diligence and judgment performs the first operation on the malformed rectum”. It is pertinent to recapitulate at the moment that Willis J Potts was one of the earliest Pediatric Surgeon in America who went on to establish a Children hospital in Chicago.
But one need not have to go so far as to America to gain such knowledge when in fact one professor from our country realized the wisdom when he reiterated something like (not adverbatim) “A continent anal canal differentiates human from animals”.
The power of the anus was well appreciated by Golligher also. Though the flow is from the north downwards i.e. colon, rectum and thence only anus, yet Golligher didnot hazard or dare to put “anus” behind rectum or colon, for, he went against the overwhelming tide and put “Anus” ahead of the rather more fashionable colon and rectum while deciding on the title of his famous book- “Surgery of the ‘anus’, rectum, and colon” !!.
If that is not enough to impress you then please take the pains to count and you will be surprised that in the “index” section of the said book, the “anus” has 42 entries under it, in contrast to the Colon with 39 entries and the rectum, a poor 29 !!
Furthermore Golligher could summerize the anatomy of the colon in 2½ pages and the rectum in 3 pages only, whereas he took a whopping 11½ pages to enumerate the anus !!. He explained this discrepancy by telling us that “this short passage, though only 3 cms long, (compare the colon and rectum together comprising 132 cms !!), is of the greatest surgical importance both because of its role in the mechanism of rectal continence …..for those reasons its anatomy…….require to be considered in DISPROPORTIONATELY greater detail.
One cannot be impressed by the impression the anus has on our psyche and memory. Ask anyone with a history of “fissure in ano” and he will vouch that during “yummy yummy” feasts, how that “early morning memory” prevents him from savouring the delights of a sumptuous mutton meal !.
Though I have removed quite a few Foreign bodies from the upteen sites of the Gastro-intestinal tract described in textbooks, yet the lingering personal memory that looms large is that of the frantic calls from a buddy friend of mine with a fish bone impacted in his anal canal only.
We still suffer from the collonial hangover and tend to accept anything from the the west or the north as superior. That is why the mouth so often gets the better of the anus. But ask any microbiologist and he will tell you that it is in fact the other way round.
If even still someone has a doubt then I would like to challenge one to mix air and water in his mouth and then try to separate both and then to selectively spit out air without leaking water. Let me be honest, you will surely be put to shame. The anus will have the last laugh I promise.
The anus is wrongly ignored in more than one ways. When the word “per” means via, by or through, why do we do “per” rectal examinations day in day out bypassing the anus, is incomprehensible to me !! It is pertinent to inform those esteemed ones who prefer to do per “rectal” examinations over “per anal” that, the first and the only requisite to perform the examination is to have a patent anus !! I would fondly like to remember late Professor Hiranya Kumar Bora sir (founder of Pediatric Surgery department of GMCH) in this regard who was never tired of telling me “Rupnayan- that there are only 2 contraindications for not doing a PR examination or rather 2 situations only when one cannot do the PR examination- either the patient doesnot have an anus or the surgeon does not have fingers (or toes !!! 😄)”.
But such grammatical mistakes are universal, for it is not unusual to see one asking for the birth rate of a country per anum. The correct answer to the question, ‘What is the birthrate per anum?’ is zero (one hopes) — Mary Roach. (Annum, with two n’s, means yearly !!).
One day I was startled to hear the sound of my father’s fart when my father was nowhere around. To my surprise I realized that in fact it was actually myself who had released the gas. I can vouch that your sphincter downstairs can reproduce ad verbatim the notes of that of your parents and put your voice box, lying nearer to heaven, to shame !
And yes, the anus is often upto mischief as the adage examplifies- “there is no greater injustice when anus farts, head receives a knock” a meaning similar to the adage “it is the mouth that speaks, but the ear that ‘feels’ the shame”.
Always remember my dear friends, whenever one advices you to swallow your inflated “BIG” ego that,
“he who swallows a coconut must have complete trust in his anus”.
Sincerely yours
Rupnayan